Oh he's still adjusting (perhaps)
Its just the language barrier (nope, that "sit still and be quiet" look is the same in both languages. Trust me.)
He'll be "better" when he's had more time to adjust... (not likely)
The bottom line is my kid is not respecting someone else's authority. And that is not ok. Yes his world has been turned upside down by international adoption. He needs extra grace. Yes, has a social history full of pain and rejection, which means extra hugs and kisses. Those are truths. Not excuses. Deep inside this boy is a child of God who will someday become a man of God. But not if people let him get away with negative behavior.
We've considered several options:
1. Give him a teenage buddy to help him "understand" his environment (which probably won't change anything because it's an authority issue, not an understanding issue)
2. start using the positive reward system - which I loathe. Shiny gold stickers make me think of a puppy trained to preform, not a child of God with an obedient heart.
3. Find someone he does respect to lead his little heart (aka Mom, Dad or Grandma). Which yes, will work. But not for the long run. I can't go to college with him to be his conscience.
4. Be willing to feel helpless. Sometimes when I face a huge problem (that I didn't create but am still responsible for "fixing") I have to wonder if the source of the problem isn't just God asking me to be willing to be helpless for a little while.
Yes, my child I have asked you to fix this problem. No you don't have solution today. And that is ok, because there is an answer, and I will show it to you when the time comes. I just need you to understand that I am in control, and it's my problem to fix through you.
That I can do.
And to all those Sunday school teachers who have been rather annoyed by my son who is dancing around the room during story time - my sincerest apologies.