This beautiful life

Hanging on to this ordinary life with every thing I have.

Refusing to let winter win. 

Loving each kid in their own individual way.

And just trying to keep it all together.

Instagram moments from my very ordinary, and very beautiful life. 

Moments that I don't dare forget...

Currently...

we are:
waiting: to be buried up to our elbows in white powdery snow. Some of us have our doubts for this winter, others are saying it ain't over till it's over.

hearing: the final stages of our transition from Russian to English. Little Max likes to tell us that he speaks English, not Russian. But funny enough he says these words in Russian

seeing: embracing the winter color pallete outside our windows. This year it is filled with earthy browns, greys and greens, and while we wish it was filled with white, silver and blue, we're finding there's still beauty in brown.

tasting: pelmeni by the boat load. If that's what you can call the crazy concoctions Jory dreams up. Maybe experiments in the shape of pelmeni would be a better definition of what we are eating.

dreaming: now that our debt is paid off, we can't help but daydream about handing fat checks to people who need a financial miracle of their own.

How it's going... this week

As with any addition to the family, it's important to continually redefine normal, to record how we are relating to each other, and the world around us, to recognize miniscule milestones, and celebrate them as they pass.
With that said, how did our family define normal this week?
As the Mama, I went through a colossal mental shift in relating to little Max and his tantrums. I talked a little bit about it here, but basically I went from "why is this kid pushing my buttons all the time" to "this really isn't about me, is it?" when I stopped taking my son's emotional breakdowns personally there was definitely a shift in my attitude, and how I addressed the situation. Why it took me three weeks to figure all this out is beyond me. All I can say is that Max is definitely responding to my emotional shift, and he's a happy little camper. We went from 5 tantrums on Tuesday, to none on Friday. That doesn't mean the meltdown days are over, but we're definitely making progress over here.
Another exciting development we had this week is that Max had a little hang out time at Grandma's house without his mom or sibs. Because of his social history we are constantly watching for signs of separation anxiety and attachment disorders. We were pretty sure we wouldn't be able to leave him with anyone for at least 6 months. But apparently he has enough of a relationship with Grandma to hang out with her for half an hour while Mom goes to get the others from their various classes. I imagine it helps that Grandma loves to plan fun activities, like cooking spaghetti. Good stuff.
Oh, and during his 4th time in his life ever entering a swimming pool my little man totally taught himself how to swim. My little guy who wouldn't go in water deeper than his knees on his first 3 visits to the pool not only worked up the nerve to completely submerge himself, but also had his arms and legs coordinated enough to swim 4 feet at a time. The lifeguard and I were both completely amazed. As is common with most children who've spent time in an orphanage, this kid is more athletic than all 5 of us put together.

Because

Because it's Thursday
Because they're totally into having their hair braided.
Because sometimes they need to feel like they're the center of my universe...

Because I love the way they make each other laugh
Because of those teeth.
But mostly just because it they're all mine...

Happy Thursday from Princess Twinkle Toes #1 and #2

A House with a History

It was a favorite toy of ours growing up. Granny's beloved doll house. It lived in her basement, and my sister and I played with it as kids. Some of my most treasured memories of my grandmothers house are tied to this doll house. It was no surprise that it was one of the first things my daughters gravitated towards at my aunt's house.

It really was a magical place full of magical treasures

I'm so glad they discovered it.

Blessing in the shape of a bubble

Let this be your daily reminder to stop charging through life. Turn off the crazy and be amazed by the simple beauty of bubbles

Share a golden sunlit moment with the ones who bring you joy, you won't be sorry.

Whispers from the garden

Over the weekend I was Walking around in my garden. After I noticed all the tiny buds and other treasures my garden had to show me I stopped to listen to what my garden had to say to me. I have to admit, my plants make me chuckle.
I have dill growing in random places (that I'm quite sure I didn't plant) which is surely the result of the epic dill seed fight my kids had with their brother Max last summer. Oh Max and his dill. I have never met someone who could plop themselves in the garden and pick dill and eat it like candy. Now that I've been to Russia I understand the relationship. Next year there will be a large section of dill in the garden, just for him.
On a completely unrelated note, I also had a little conversation with my black eyed susans... the ones who are literally taking over each garden I put them in. It went something like this: You are not allowed to take over this garden too. You can have that one over there, but not this one. Really. You can't. I have no where to transplant you, and none of my friends want you. So just stop growing. I'm not kidding. If you don't watch it you're going to end up on the compost pile.
Am I the only one who talks to her plants? Probably not. I'm just the only one who records the conversation for other people to read.

Wake up call

This morning I received a rather interesting wake up call. It wasn't the loud obnoxious one that lives on my nightstand, it was more of a gentle tug, and it was in my heart. Jesus had something he wanted to show me, and he wanted me to see it NOW.

So before my alarm went off, I picked up my camera (because when Jesus has something to show you, it's going to be good, right?) and stepped out into the still cool morning. I walked past all the obviously interesting stuff in my garden, that's not where I was headed. I had my eyes glued to the dew coated meadow next to our house that was dazzling in the early morning sun. I stopped to admire the diamond coated grass that came up to my knees, but that wasn't it either. I walked a little further to the section of 5 foot tall Queen Anne's Lace. There standing in the shoulder high weeds I found my treasure. Not only did I find delight in the beauty of God's creation, but I also found the joy and peace Christ offers when you follow.

So you wanna see my souvenirs?

Treasure Seekers...

All to often we (ok, I) race through this life just trying to keep up with ourselves. We might stop and admire a beautiful rose on a bush for a second, but did we stop to notice the tiny buds on that bush that aren't quite as glamorous? The tiny buds that are a promise of more good things to come? How about those tiny dew drops that dazzle like diamonds when the sun hits them just right. Did you see those? Today I invite you to search for your hidden treasure. Open your Bible. Take a nature walk. Call a friend. Scrutinize your life and seek out that tiny treasure. It's there. I promise.

Treasures for today

Moment by moment our garden changes. As I stroll past the beds, I pause and wonder... when did those open up? When did that pop out of the ground? Holy smokes we're going to have a lot of (fill in the blank) this year.

As the craziness of summer is just beginning, and the amount of time I have to pay attention to the garden dwindles, I take a moment to pause. Not to take in the abundance of weeds (that I'm not bothering to pluck), but to take in the treasures that today has to share with me. Tomorrow I might not have a few seconds to be thrilled over each tiny new development my garden has for me, but today I do. Today I can mourn over the passing from the season of abundant lillies to the season of roses. Today I can be thrilled over those tiny buds that developed over night on my choreopsis.

Reality

I think as mothers we all believe we are the only mother on the planet who doesn't have her act together. I'm guilty of comparing myself to the Hollywood moms on sitcoms that have immaculate houses and lawns, and children who are silent when they're not on camera. Sometimes I have a hard time believing that all those other blogger moms live Hollywood lives and I'm the only one who doesn't.

It takes a brave woman to admit that she really doesn't have her act together.

With that said, lets be real about what life really looks like in this house.

3 kids who are home all day, who don't watch tv or play video games = a really messy house. Legos, books, art supplies, jewelry, coats, boots, and crumpled paper. In every corner of my house. Every day. And I really really hate yelling at them to clean it up as they go, so I usually let it accumulate until dinner time.
For those of you who actually know my kids, they might seem well mannered and polite. They aren't. They lie, cheat and steal with the rest of them. And yes, I have been known to explode when they don't listen to me, which usually happens at least once a day.
Our house is not stylish. I was sort of waiting to decorate it until the kids got a little older and stopped jumping on the furniture. Well I'm starting to think that'll happen when they've left for college. So my couch from the early 80's... Yea... I guess it'll just have to last a little longer.
Oh, and while we're on the topic of our house. Lets just say this one wasn't built for a family of 6.
In a perfect world we'd be able to use our 2 acre advantage to add another 2-3 rooms onto this house. I'd love to have dormatory style rooms for kids (one for girls, one for boys) with a play area / school space between the rooms. But I can't even think about making those kinds of investments until we have our adoption debt paid off...

At the risk of letting our adoption agency know what our house really looks like... this is what my house really looks like.

Spring firsts

First it was the daffodil nubs

Then yesterday we heard the spring peepers for the first time

Today we had our first picnic on the porch.

These are some of the ways we treasure those early spring moments. How 'bout you?